This is Epth Nation

Epth is a state of mind, not a place. Reading this will give you a virtual drivers license in that state, but you'll still need to be 21 to purchase alcohol. And you can't get any there anyway, so stop asking.

Friday, May 27, 2005

Wevenge of the Thith

I finally get to see "Episode III" today, and I kind of wonder why I'm going at all. It's not like I'm a real Star Wars fan. My wife likes to think of me as a nerd, which is fine, but I've never been that into Star Wars or Star Trek or Star Anything, really. I was 5 years old in 1977, and way too much of a scaredy- cat to see the original in the theater*. This set me back a few years, and by the time I saw Return of the Jedi in the theater, I had only seen Star Wars once on video and hadn't seen The Empire Strikes Back at all (although I knew the story involved -- in 1981 you couldn't swing a cat without hitting someone who was saying, "Luke, I am your father!"). I liked the movies well enough, but they never struck that deep chord within me, the chord that causes people to attach danish to either side of their 5-year-old daughter's head. That space-nerd-story chord was reserved for my later reading of Hitchhiker's Guide. By the time Episode 1 and its stupid title and all its other crappiness came out, I was barely interested in the Star Wars story at all. Apparently George Lucas felt the same way, judging by the existence of Jar Jar Binks.

Everyone I know who has seen Episode III says it's good. Obviously, Darth Vader is "born" in this movie, which has to make it at least partly cool. I'm sure it looks and feels spectacular. I'm skeptical of Hayden Christiansen (sp?) as Darth, though. I guess they had to pick someone skinny and whiny enough to pass for a young Mark Hamill's father.

Also, is Christopher Lee going to play a second-banana bad guy in every big movie series from now on? He's being typecast.

Because I am seeing this movie, today will be quite a busy day, so no more blogging for me unless something crazy happens that I have to report. I'm under a lot of pressure here. I'm starting to sweat bullets. I probably shouldn't be drinking this much coffee in the morning.

*Even though I never saw the movie, I had Star Wars figures just like everyone else. The ones I owned: Luke Skywalker: X-Wing Pilot, C3PO, Greedo, and a robot that looked like a trash compactor with legs that may or may not have been named R2D4. One of my friends had the original Millenium Falcon. We promptly trashed it.


  • At 10:10 PM, Blogger Brian said…

    Coffee? Don't you mean mountain dew?

  • At 7:25 AM, Blogger Mike Pape said…

    Alas, I didn't have 55 cents, therefore it had to be coffee.

    Yes, it was a bummer.


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