This is Epth Nation

Epth is a state of mind, not a place. Reading this will give you a virtual drivers license in that state, but you'll still need to be 21 to purchase alcohol. And you can't get any there anyway, so stop asking.

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Let's Give Thanks for Ron Dayne

Just when I think there's nowhere to go but up, Ron Dayne comes along and destroys the Cowboys to make this a happy Thanksgiving. Not that I necessarily want the Cowboys destroyed (which I unnecessarily do), but it's Ron Dayne -- a Heisman Trophy running back from Wisconsin -- that did them in. You really can't ask for much more out of a football game than that.

Not only that, but I'm scheduled to work at 8am tomorrow. The store opens at 6am for the post-thanksgiving craziness, and I probably won't get to see any of it. I love it when things come together like that. I'm not happy about going to work, but I'm confident my whole experimental time at this job is coming to an end, and soon. Poking the sleeping giant wasn't a good idea on their part. I'm not an orange -- you can't squeeze me and expect more to come out. Rather, I'm like a transdimensional death orange -- squeeze me and I disappear.

Sorry I've been so surly lately. I should probably quit posting from work for a while...wait, that's crazy talk.

Hey, just to clarify something that may not be clear -- I'm really a good employee, or have been up until next week. I've done every insane thing they ask (within reason) and done it well. I help out other people there all the time, too. But this week has just been madness. And if you think I'm disgruntled, you should see the other long-time workers there. The only happy people you see there are salespeople (because they make all the commissions) and the Managers (because they stand to get bonuses and justify their existences). Everyone else wants to kill something, and the sale's only been going on for 6 days. We have 7 more weeks of this! There may not be a store when it's all over, with all the potential "Milton's" all over the place.

Not only that, but get this -- our "incentive plan" for the service department just went into effect. That means that if we reach certain numbers, everyone in the department gets up to 27 extra bucks a week in our paycheck. It's supposed to encourage teamwork, and that's good. But guess what? Every minute they call on me to do something stupid is a minute I'm away from helping out the service department in their cause to get more money. You can see how this creates a crappy situation that nobody likes. I mean, 27 bucks isn't a lot, but it has become symbolically important ever since they decided to work against us having it. When they make me do the job I hate, they get to have better numbers and look better in front of the home office wanks that are lurking all over the place. Meanwhile, we lose money and look worse at our jobs. The more I think about it, the more I think I better be getting a Christmas bonus this year. And by "bonus," I don't mean a December hot-dog cookout, either. You just know that's what they're planning.

I'm as angry as I've ever been at an employer, and I realize it's my fault for being there so long. This big sale has been in the works for six months, and there were signs that Management was not interested in their employees benefitting from it. I'm about 3 more bad days from calling the company a Bad One to Work For, and I've never been tempted to do that before. I guess I'm just blessed. And thankful.


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