Blogging Consultants
I've read a lot of "advice for bloggers" online, and it's all across the board. Most of it depends on what you're trying to accomplish, and who you're trying to reach. But it's always fun to see what advice is out there, at the very least just to mock it.
For example, Salon.com has a whole army of bloggers, most of whom seem to be sporting bad moustaches. They have a section of blogs dedicated to understanding blogs and blogging. One moustachioed Canadian made observations about the 300 random blogs he visited. Another moustachioed dude of unknown nationality wrote about how advertisers might do better to concentrate on blogs that don't have 150,000 page views a day. This is all terribly boring, and this is just one of the billion sites dedicated to this topic. All these useless words are stored as binary information on a server somewhere. Should we be outraged about this? Where are the techno-environmentalists when you need them? Put down that Linux code and get over here!
So what do I bring to this blogging advice table, you may ask? Here's my advice to beginning bloggers, with a caveat: Only use this advice if you want me personally as an avid reader of your blog. I can't speak for anybody else, because it's against the law.
1) I can't say this slowly or clearly enough (and this is something I catch myself violating all the time, btw): Never assume what your audience is thinking. You see this all the time on conservablogs or liberablogs. YOU'RE NOT A TALK-RADIO SHOW, AND YOU SHOULD NOT ASSUME THAT THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO READ YOU AGREE WITH YOU. THERE ARE NO DITTOHEADS HERE. IF YOU JUST PREACH TO THE CHOIR WITH NO EXPLANATION OF YOUR UNDERLYING PHILOSOPHY, YOU ARE NO BETTER THAN SEAN HANNITY OR ANY OF THOSE GRAVELLY VOICES ON AIR AMERICA. IF YOU DON'T TELL ME WHY YOU HAVE A CERTAIN OPINION, YOU'VE JUST WASTED THE TIME OF EVERYONE WHO READS YOUR BLOG.
2) Never, ever, type in all caps. Makes you look like you're shouting.
3) In layout, less is more. Unless you want to attract and hold the attention of ADHD kids (which is a losing proposition, let me tell you), go simple and elegant, clearly labeling everything. I shouldn't have to search around your page, squinting for what I'm looking for. It helps greatly to have nothing blinking. The color of the words should be adequately contrasted to the color of the background, which should be a solid color and not just a grayed-out picture of someone's cat.
4) Only post things you're comfortable with everyone in the world reading, including your mom, boss, rommate, wife, grandpa, the Jews, etc. For example, I post things about Papa John's because I don't care if they fire me. My other job, I respect its privacy even though it sucks. If you want to be free to write anything you want, adopt a fake name -- it's free, and the internet is all about anonymity. Just ask this guy. Ok, don't ask him, but still.
5) Be interesting. Come at things from a fresh angle. Be original.
6) Whatever you do, don't use word you made up (and is actually an inside joke that only one or two other people know the full meaning of) in the title of your blog. That just confuses the reader, and kills traffic. People who do this should be made into scapegoats and paraded before all the good people of the town in chains. Chains.
For example, Salon.com has a whole army of bloggers, most of whom seem to be sporting bad moustaches. They have a section of blogs dedicated to understanding blogs and blogging. One moustachioed Canadian made observations about the 300 random blogs he visited. Another moustachioed dude of unknown nationality wrote about how advertisers might do better to concentrate on blogs that don't have 150,000 page views a day. This is all terribly boring, and this is just one of the billion sites dedicated to this topic. All these useless words are stored as binary information on a server somewhere. Should we be outraged about this? Where are the techno-environmentalists when you need them? Put down that Linux code and get over here!
So what do I bring to this blogging advice table, you may ask? Here's my advice to beginning bloggers, with a caveat: Only use this advice if you want me personally as an avid reader of your blog. I can't speak for anybody else, because it's against the law.
1) I can't say this slowly or clearly enough (and this is something I catch myself violating all the time, btw): Never assume what your audience is thinking. You see this all the time on conservablogs or liberablogs. YOU'RE NOT A TALK-RADIO SHOW, AND YOU SHOULD NOT ASSUME THAT THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO READ YOU AGREE WITH YOU. THERE ARE NO DITTOHEADS HERE. IF YOU JUST PREACH TO THE CHOIR WITH NO EXPLANATION OF YOUR UNDERLYING PHILOSOPHY, YOU ARE NO BETTER THAN SEAN HANNITY OR ANY OF THOSE GRAVELLY VOICES ON AIR AMERICA. IF YOU DON'T TELL ME WHY YOU HAVE A CERTAIN OPINION, YOU'VE JUST WASTED THE TIME OF EVERYONE WHO READS YOUR BLOG.
2) Never, ever, type in all caps. Makes you look like you're shouting.
3) In layout, less is more. Unless you want to attract and hold the attention of ADHD kids (which is a losing proposition, let me tell you), go simple and elegant, clearly labeling everything. I shouldn't have to search around your page, squinting for what I'm looking for. It helps greatly to have nothing blinking. The color of the words should be adequately contrasted to the color of the background, which should be a solid color and not just a grayed-out picture of someone's cat.
4) Only post things you're comfortable with everyone in the world reading, including your mom, boss, rommate, wife, grandpa, the Jews, etc. For example, I post things about Papa John's because I don't care if they fire me. My other job, I respect its privacy even though it sucks. If you want to be free to write anything you want, adopt a fake name -- it's free, and the internet is all about anonymity. Just ask this guy. Ok, don't ask him, but still.
5) Be interesting. Come at things from a fresh angle. Be original.
6) Whatever you do, don't use word you made up (and is actually an inside joke that only one or two other people know the full meaning of) in the title of your blog. That just confuses the reader, and kills traffic. People who do this should be made into scapegoats and paraded before all the good people of the town in chains. Chains.
posted by Mike Pape @ 6:26 AM
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