This is Epth Nation

Epth is a state of mind, not a place. Reading this will give you a virtual drivers license in that state, but you'll still need to be 21 to purchase alcohol. And you can't get any there anyway, so stop asking.

Friday, March 18, 2005

S/S/Not Updating Very Much

To paraphrase the great Tony Bennett, "It's the most wonderful time...of the year". No, not that festival of light and cold and consumer spending known as Christmas. This is a better time. No, not St. Patrick's day, the day we celebrate St. Patrick getting drunk. It's just a coincedence that this Time of Year happened on March 17th.

Of course, I'm talking about the NCAA Tournament. 4 days and 4 nights of talented kids trying as hard as they can in an athletic endeavor we call basketball. And even on years like this year, where there are very few upsets and a lot of teams winning comfortably, it's still awesome. I took off work for it, in fact. Here are some observations/stories from the past few days, mostly not involving the Tournament:

I went to a Hooter's for the first time, and I gotta say, I don't get the "nude pantyhose and shorts" look. It seems like they could do better, but they're stuck in it because it's what people expect when they come to Hooter's. And even young inappropriate men must admit that the Breastaurant* concept is really silly, from the double-entendre name to the underwear-esque outfits to the TV overload to the hula hoops. The buffalo chicken sandwich I had was awesome, however. I went with the wife, because it seems less wrong that way, don't you think? She says that most guys would want a wife who would go to Hooters with them, and I do like that, but I think most guys go to Hooter's to escape from their wives. It's like their Safe House, or what we referred to as "Ghoul" when I was a kid. And she said she wouldn't want to work there because (paraphrasing) she wouldn't trust the customer's intentions. I put that really mildly, btw. I agree with her, and the customers give off a vibe I can only describe as inappropriate. Or sad.
But Jill did get a little basketball hoop/ball for her classroom, as well as bragging rights for being the most beautiful girl there (it being the kind of place you are constantly wondering if guys are looking at your wife, because females=eye magnets there). Are you gagging right now? Good.

We went to a different Breastaurant, Skoots, on Thursday. We are way more familiar with Skoots, since it is right by our home and in the same parking lot as where I work. My wife noticed a waitress confrontation there, and we theorized a fistfight happened after the two girls went in the back room. But we could see no physical evidence of such a fight, so it probably never happened. My wife (being the one who talks to strangers) asked our cleavagey waitress Nicolette why there was so much waitress turnover there, and she danced around the reason for a while by saying, "Well, some girls work out and other's don't", "The management wants the girls to have a certain look", and so on. What she really meant is fat=fired.

I'm going to Austin tomorrow and coming back Sunday, so I probably won't post again until then. We're going to see a band called Wandering Sons, who are playing in Austin at the same time as South by Southwest. I should be a crazy time. Maybe I'll do a photo essay! Don't hold your breath.

Later, dudes.


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